Divorce doesn’t always have to be contentious, and it certainly doesn’t have to end up in a court battle. Granted, it can be hard to be civil in certain scenarios and even more difficult to put emotions aside and come to a resolution.
You don’t have to do it alone, though. Divorce mediation, with the help of a professional and experienced mediator, can be a great way to settle your divorce without it turning into a large battle. Before you begin mediating a divorce, you should prepare yourself with these tips.
Agree to see a mediator
As with marriage, divorce is a dance that requires two people. It can become one-sided in a courtroom, but in order to keep things civilized and fair, both parties have to agree to mediation. That doesn’t mean you and your spouse have to get along to mediate your divorce, but you should have a serious conversation about it. Look at the pros and cons of seeing a divorce mediator, and come to a conclusion together. If one side is forced into it or doesn’t take the process seriously, then it won’t be effective. It needs to be a decision that both of you make.
Go over assets
Part of divorce mediation is finding a fair way to split up assets. This can be challenging and take longer than it needs to if you don’t even know what those assets are. So before you visit the mediator, compile a list of all every asset you own. That doesn’t mean just what you own personally, but what you as a couple own. There may be things that your spouse owns that you aren’t aware of, so try to get a complete list. The mediator will help with the divorce separation and property agreements. Being honest and truthful about your possessions will not only expedite the process but can save you from legal complications down the road.
Draw the line
Now that you have a list of all of your assets, you should spend some time figuring out what you truly cannot live without, and what isn’t as important to you. This will help you pick your battles during the divorce mediation process. Being unrealistic and fighting over something that you’ve never wanted or used before will only make the process more difficult, so isolate the things that you actually want. You’ll both find that coming to an agreement on asset division to be much easier if there are clear lines drawn in the sand.
Having an open mind but with clear goals is the key to a successful mediation. Over two-thirds of couples who mediated a divorce were satisfied with the outcome of the entire process, and you could be too.